What would your biography look like?

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to write a biography of your life?  Would it be a comedy or tragedy? Would it be a drama or horror? Would you be proud or embarrassed?

A couple weeks ago I asked some friends what I should write about and they all said that I should write about my life.  I started the blog line of “Bobby’s rules to landing your gay man,” which so far I have only written two entries for.  That is partially because I am stuck on how to write about jealousy.  I have taken a few stabs at it, but haven’t come up with anything I like yet. With that said, today I put more thought into the “my life” idea and it got me thinking about what my life would look like in print. 

It didn’t take me long to come up with an analogy to what I think my biography would look like.  I think a biography of my life would look like Jungle Juice, the party punch served often at college and frat parties.  Basically a crap shoot of anything and everything, yet still kind of good and can make you a bit messed up after you consume it.

Albeit I would be writing about the truth, or my view on the truth, I know if I wrote everything about my life I would face an onslaught of lawsuits (as previously explained by my biological father who views the truth as slander) when writing about situations involving certain relatives.

When writing about experiences with friends it would be a bit more of a comedy, at times following the script of The Sweetest Thing and at other times following the script of American Pie (the gay version).  I am almost intrigued by the thought of it, but doubt I have the patients to sit down and write anything out.

What would your biography be like?