Tag Archives: Friends

Song of the Day – BobbyTBD Blogs are Back

IMG_3137For the first time since I announced that I had decided to leave New York City and head to Los Angeles I have decided to pick up my blogging again.  Not exactly where I left off though.  After a couple months off of my typical blogging routine which consisted of listening to music and writing I have found myself in a new place.  A place where I feel safe and comfortable to start writing about my life again.

I took a break because I was sick of being sad.  Every blog had a theme and that theme was me trying to make myself push through a horrible year.  I was writing about divorce, life changes that scared the hell out of me and often the need to find strength even though I felt constantly weak.

Times have changed.  You see, there was period last year, before I met my boyfriend and connected with many of the friends I have735958_10100906850830716_264286980_o today where I felt broken.  My heart ached everyday when I woke up and alone was a word that defined every fiber of my being.  The guy crying in the corner of his kitchen on Riverside Drive as he watched everything he knew melt away is no longer the guy that I am. Today I am a guy who smiles surrounded by amazing people.

Yes, I still cry.  Everyone knows it and anyone who has tried to say goodbye to me as I get ready to move this week has definitely witnessed a few tears fall from my eyes. Yes, I’m still not perfect, but I am one thing I wasn’t last year.  I am loved and I know it.  Many people in my life have watched me go through an emotional roller coaster this past month (and for that matter the past year and a half), but this past month the emotions are different.  They aren’t sadness because I have nothing (sorry Whitney, but you aren’t getting this song of the day blog).  They are tears of the best sort.  You see I am no longer the guy that cries alone in his kitchen.  I am the guy that knows he isn’t alone and is surrounded by love and compassion.

778703_10100974203470486_996079940_oLast winter/spring a guy I use to think was a good friend called me and said I would never make real friends.  I have the inability to connect and understand others and make friends, at least that’s how I was made to feel.  I wouldn’t find that type of love.  I’d be alone.   For whatever reason, I believed him and among all the things I was feeling last year his words stained my heart and broke me just a bit more than I already was.  I gave up all my strength and passed it to those who counted against me.

Now I’m in pain because I am sad that for the first time in my life I feel like I belong.  I can honestly tell myself that my so called friend couldn’t have been more wrong and I was an idiot for listening to him.  When I announced my decision to move it felt like the hearts and souls of everyone I know opened up and embraced me.  The flood of support I received overwhelmed my senses in the best of ways while at the same time tearing down the negativity I had felt deep inside.  Every tear I drop is dropped because I am sad, sad to have fought for so long to feel loved and supported to realize it was already right there in front of me and yet so happy that I have the ability to be sad in this way.

Maybe it sounds crazy, but a year ago I was crying because I had nothing.  Now when I cry it is because I feel like I have everything I have ever wanted.  I am thankful to shed tears because I have to say goodbye to people who love me.  It’s a far distance601228_10100947988550396_2098358610_n from where I was a year ago.

I’m so thankful for these past few months and I’m so glad I get to leave New York knowing that I can be loved and I can make friends. It’s a new start that I get to start with a confidence that I owe to each of my friends, supporters, champions and my boyfriend. Even if I stumble a little here and there I am on my feet again.

Be prepared because BobbyTBD is back up and running and I will be detailing this new experience. This experience that isn’t about loss, but about gaining.  It’s about rebirth. It will be about taking myself out of the constant blogs of needing to be strong and fighting to make it and instead they will be about the fact that I am strong and have made it.

484779_10100943878776416_1910642851_nI’m landing on my feet and I am standing tall so as a reintroduction to my long-lost Song of the Day blogs I am dedicating this first blog back to the ever amazing song sung by Cher, You Haven’t Seen The Last Of Me because this is a song I wrote about a year ago and what it meant to my life at the time.  I wrote swearing to those who counted against me, like my so called friend briefly mentioned above, that I was going to make it and you shouldn’t count me out or down.  I have landed on my feet and as Cher sings, “you can’t stop me.”

 

NYC Tweetup – October 13th!

NYC Tweetup – October 13th!

Oh Twitter.  What can I say about Twitter?  I fought against joining it forever (similarly to how I originally refused to give up on Myspace and join Facebook).  Then the inevitable happened, I joined Twitter!  It’s been an interesting experience to say the least.

I remember the day I decided to try this social media website out.  The first thing I did was add the 15 “real life” friends I had who were on Twitter.  Then I sent out a tweet saying something like, “How do I tweet?  I don’t get it.”

Within seconds I was getting advice from my friends and, what I found strange as a new twitterer, I got advice from friends of friends.  Before I knew it my twitter was consuming my attention when at my computer.  New people were following me left and right and tweeting about everything of interest to me.  I had debates about politics, talked about night life and discussed traveling destinations.

From those introductory twitter conversations my twitter profile started to connect me with people I genuinely found to be of interest.  I can’t remember who was the first person, but one day a twitter follower from New York City suggested we meetup.  I thought about it for all of a second and decided that we clearly had shared interest… we were tweeting all the time after all, we basically knew each other and I am always up to meet new friends.

Somehow that one attempt at meeting a follower in hopes of becoming friends started a trend.  Since then I have met many twitter friends and transitioned them to face to face real life friends.

That’s why when my friend Tony suggested a tweetup of all our NYC twitter people I thought it would be a great opportunity to further integrate twitter to life.  This meetup is still in the process of being planned but it will take place on the evening of Saturday October 13th in NYC.  If you have any interest in joining us please follow the link below and RSVP (even if tentatively) and come take your twitter friends from @ signs to voices and faces:

http://tweetvite.com/event/NYCTweetupGuysNight

A few pictures of some of the friends I have met via Twitter over the past couple years.

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My Birthday Wish List

My mother keeps asking me what I want for my birthday.  Literally, she has been calling me just about every day for the past week and a half.  I know it is cute and shows that she cares, but I can’t give her a list of things I want. 

Maybe it is because I am older (something I have to deal with), but gifts seem overrated this year.  What I really want is for her to just cover my birthday brunch and/or dinner.  The problem for her is that she wants something that is a surprise or that I can unwrap.  I get that desire and appreciate it completely, I particularly get it for when I was a kid, but things change as we age.  

If someone really wants to buy me a gift they can, but the things I want are on a different level now than they were when I was a kid and are things I really need to pick out myself.  What do I mean? 

  1. I’d love a new couch for my new living room.
  2. I’d love a new bed frame and dresser for the bedroom. 
  3. I’d love a new area rug for the living room.
  4. I’d love new clothes, but we all know a nice top that can be worn at both work and still cross over to the perfect Saturday night outfit is going to be $70 – $100 for one item. 

So why not just cover brunch.  You are allowing me to spend time with people I enjoy being around.  You are the reason I am getting to sit, laugh and enjoy my birthday.  It may not be a tangible gift, but it’s not about the gifts any more.  It’s about mourning the fact that I am another year older… oops, did I say mourning?  I meant that it’s about celebrating the fact that I am another year older. 

Anyways, I appreciate the desire to buy me gifts and I realize it’s something society makes us feel required to do, but spending a little time with me will suffice.  My mother is driving all the way from Virginia this Thursday to spend no more than 12 hours with me and then driving back to Virginia.  She is doing this all to take me out to an early birthday dinner.  That is all I need.  Time, attention and showing that you care. 

Basically I am writing this to all of my friends and the few family members still in my life.  If any of my friends want to show me they care send me a time you want to hang out, go on a walk, a run, a picnic, watch a movie, play a board game or go dancing.  That’s what I am looking for and what will hit home.  The gift will be in the pictures and the memories. 

And if you really need me to unwrap something then remember that champagne is always welcome. Champagne is good anytime, anywhere and for any reason.  With that said I must say that a brunch or movie night will probably last longer with me though!